Finding Your Princess or Your Frog

I have been asked by parents at the Korean church to teach them what the Bible says about dating. I will be presenting the material I’ve prepared in a few weeks first for the parents, and then a week or so later to the youth of the church. As I’ve read up on the topic I’ve come to the conclusion that in general, this issue is more about wisdom vs. foolishness rather than right vs. wrong. Yet, there are a few things that are black and white in nature.

One example of a black and white issue is being equally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14ff). The principle for dating/marriage is that if you are a believer then you should only pursue another believer. I can’t begin to imagine how difficult it would be to be married to an unbeliever! To be united to one who hates or at the least rejects what is most precious to you, namely Christ! How hard would that be!

Another example of a black and white issue is premarital physical intimacy (1 Corinthians 6:15ff). Physical intimacy is something God has reserved for the marriage union for, as Paul says in 1 Corinthians 6, when a couple engages in physical intimacy two become one. Marriage is a sacred institute that physical intimacy is reserved for.

While I will definitely teach on these black and white issues to the church, I also need to address these areas that require wisdom. I want to ask a few questions and get some of your thoughts on these issues. I already have some opinions on these questions, but I think it would be good for me to sharpen my thinking with your outlooks as well. So, here we go:

1. What is the goal of dating? Is marriage the only appropriate goal, or can maturation or just simple fun be appropriate ends?

2. What role should parents/guardians play in the dating process? Should they be consulted upfront? Should they be introduced to the significant other only when the relationship starts to get serious? Or are they so archaic that their thoughts don’t matter at all? (Also on this theme, in an ideal situation what role should the local church play?)

3. At what age should dating take place? Or, is it less about age and more about maturity. Also along these lines, how long should a dating relationship go on? Assuming it climaxes in marriage, what stage of life should you be in when you get married?

4. Is love the only prerequisite for a marriage/dating relationship? Biblically speaking, is love ever a subjective feeling in nature?

I invite you to interact with any of these questions. Help me think through these issues so I can better teach the church I am at. Let me know any or all of your thoughts on this issue – you don’t have to be limited to the 4 questions above.

Thanks for the help!

bry

Vi-queens

In our Bible Study there are fans of many football teams. Caleb and Rachel from Indiana have the blessing of being able to claim the Colts. Dan claim’s the Bears as his team. Tom has the Packers, and Jared has the Cowboys. All of these people have the respective hats and jerseys celebrating their team, and yet I am still wearing my Minnesota Twins hat and haven’t even bothered with trying to get any Vikings gear. When football comes up, I feel almost sheepish to say I’m a Vikings fan. I’ll admit my reluctant commitments when asked – and with a glimmer of team pride when the name Peterson arises. Why is this? Why is it so much easier for me to be a Twins fan than a Vikings fan? Why am I ashamed of the Vi-queens? It’s not because of the losing record. It is because of stories like this, this, and this. Come on Vikings, you can do better.
--bry

Freedom and Rights

As American’s we all enjoy the wonderful benefits that freedom offers. These freedoms are enumerated for us most often with the word “rights” in our civil setting. “You have the right to remain silent.” “…the right to bear arms.” We hear phrases like this all of the time, yet there are some “rights” we do not own. For instance, I do not have the right to inflict harm on someone. Also, I do not have the right to stop paying my income taxes (despite what some may think). America is the country of freedoms, but that is not to say there are no boundaries.

A few months ago I wrote a post on abortion challenging any of you to correct my thinking on the subject. Apparently I either convinced you who were pro-choice to change views or you who were pro-choice were too chicken to interact (insert clucking noise here). If you remember, what I did in that post was list some common objections to the pro-life position and offer short answers to them. One of those common objections was the idea that making abortion illegal somehow takes away the persons “right” of choice. I originally responded with this:

In consensual relations, the choice was made when the woman [and man] agreed to have sex. She has the right to choose whether to have sex or not. With that choice comes possible consequences/benefits, namely, pregnancy. Moreover, even if I were “taking away the right of choice”, does the baby get a choice in the matter? What about the baby’s rights?

I want to spend this post expanding on that same objection. Is the so-called “right of choice” regarding abortion a freedom we enjoy or should it be one of those areas where there is a boundary? Your answer ultimately boils down to one issue: at what point does a “potential human,” a “fetus,” a “baby,” or whatever you want to call it become a person? When does it move from having its worth identified solely with the woman’s body to its own body? At what point in a pregnancy does that thing become an individual?

There are a million different directions we could go for arguments, but since most of you are believers I want to focus only on a theological argument. If you are a believer, then no argument is more important or persuasive than what Scripture teaches. So what does Scripture teach about the personhood of a baby? To answer this question, I want to look at one passage of Scripture with you and draw some thoughts from it. That passage is found at Jeremiah 1:5 where God calls Jeremiah to the ministry. Look what it says:

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you…”

There are two things I want you to see. First of all, notice that it is God who formed Jeremiah “in the womb”. In Psalm 139:13b David describes that time like this: “…you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.” Is it only those who belong to the Lord that he “knits together”? Of course not! The creation of new life is a God-act. The taking away of life is a God-act. All of it is orchestrated by God. And how poetic the language of God “knitting” us together in our mother’s wombs! Every single baby, from conception and on, is hand-made by God.

Secondly, notice that even before God performed the beautiful act of knitting Jeremiah together, he knew him. The verb that is translated here as “knew” is the same word that describes Adam’s sexual relationship with Eve in Genesis 4:1 and 4:25. Deuteronomy 34:10 uses the same verb to describe the Lord’s relationship with Moses as “face to face”. Obviously this word can be used to describe an intimate knowledge. God’s pre-knowing of Jeremiah was an intimate knowledge, as is illustrated with the consecration (or dedication) before birth. Before he was even being formed in the womb, God intimately knew Jeremiah, which implies that Jeremiah was someone to be known. Jeremiah was an individual. It is the same with every other baby, from conception and on, they are a person.

That is only one passage of Scripture that we could look at (but perhaps it is the most compelling). I challenge you who call yourself a believer and yet still see abortion as a viable option protected by our freedoms to consider your case carefully. Again, as I did on the previous post, I invite you to correct me. Tell me where I am wrong. If you can’t, then tell me how you justify your view with Scripture. Where am I getting this wrong? Where is the disconnect? I beg of you, tell me! Why would a believer hold an unbiblical stance? As before, if necessary make a response anonymously. I won’t hold it against you. I beg of you, just think this through. More importantly, think this through biblically.

--bry

update: Al Mohler posted on the same topic this morning. He is obviously a lot smarter than me! It is a very good read. You can find it here: "Is Abortion a Theological Issue? Garry Wills Says No".

Slideshows & Whatnot

I am looking into this web albums and sideshow business. I've uploaded these through Picasa, but do any ya'll have better suggestions?

This is from a few weeks ago at Lombardi Ranch


And this is from way back it Lillian's 1st Birthday


-bry

Lillian the Leopard